Lakeland Mirror

Issue date: 11/12/09 Section: Fun House

Weitz's equation, which nearly guarantees a box-office juggernaut, would increase the quality of "New Moon." Events from the book are bound to be cut from the film-they always are in books this extensive (ex. "Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban"-Gryffindor won the Quidditch Cup for crying out loud!). Likewise, events not in Meyer's novel will probably be added to the film. Why shouldn't Kristen Stewart show a substantial amount of skin in some or all of these add-ons? If Hartwicke deemed that it was necessary for Edward to give Bella a piggyback ride and say, before jumping from a tree, "You'd better hold on tight spider monkey," is it asking too much of Weitz to include all of the sex that Stephanie Meyer must have been keeping from us?

And of the true-to-plot scenes, I'm excited for those as well. To elucidate how absolutely engrossed I was while reading the book would be a waste of my time and yours, but I will say that I, A) read it in less than a day, B) devoted a clever Facebook status to my reading of it (Danny is intoxicated on New Moonshine).

Now that I think about it, there is no way the movie version of "New Moon" will live up to the expectations I shaped for it upon reading the book. You won't catch me in a werewolf costume around midnight of the twentieth. Maybe in an inconspicuous hoodie, but never as a werewolf.

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